Lately i was feeling blue, and down i think it was the same as last year too i’m feeling like this…. not sure to talk about it trough blog or no~ but i decided to sharing here cos i have nobody to talk with and it’s driving me crazy.
so i was been in a relationship with korean guy but i wont tell name, he is kind and warm guy we just friend before but he ask me to be her GF, so we have dating from December 16 i love being with him i felt i was too comfortable talking anything with him useless stuffs and many more he also support my hobby as blogger.
sometimes i was mention him on IG bcs i was proud having him as my BF, also a few guys who like me keep think i was single bcs they didn’t see if i have a bf trough social media i kinda lazy respond them i don’t wanna cheating on my bf, i prefer to talk with him only so i show them i have this oppa already and one are enough for me. Back then he never publish any pict of us or never mention about me trough social media, i felt a bit sulky also wondering it’s might because he don’t want others girls saw me and know he have me already? i just hope is only my opinion (the fact is in real life i’ve meet some of his friends) or i felt like he don’t excited for having me? idk even now.
that moment when you was spending time with someone you love, i felt beloved just by being with him only before i was hoping to be with him for such a long time i wanna keep support and love each others even there was a distance betweens us i used to think to end it i realized LDR not easy at all, but then he questioning me like are u sure to end our relationship? let’s talk later and watching him i only can crying lah because i don’t like the fact he go back to Korea for 6months or more, he said at least we try to keep maintaining our relationship~ promises me to have video call every weekend, and said to me to save money to go korea this november visit him i’m felling so so and mixed that day was last time i met him before he went back to Korea a day after.
A weeks after he go, i felt our convo not too often like usual, then he start being so slow respond not asking me back instead after i send him a few questions, The truth is feeling changes and faded in a short time…. that makes me felt hurt, i was said happy b’day to him and said i love him trough Facebook, there was a few girls said happy b’day as well and guess what? he just reply others girls only except me omg omg he said don’t have signal but can reply others girls massages but not oven read or reply me in a few days? how come? am i invisible or what? that really hurt i can not lie i never feeling this kind of pain in my deepest heart. I was speechless also disappointed in the same time so i text him that he was cruel and i give up waiting is tiring. i mean why should do this to me? you don’t have to treat me bad like this~ so we broke up on his b’day a week ago i’m so sad but too sad to drop tears. i mean why people so easy changing mind within 2 weeks only? i was the only one who felt sad and can’t stop crying thats make me embarrassed. i mean this person is really adore you, care too much do you really have to do this to me? 😢
what the hell with him? do i ask him to give me empty promises? ALL Is Lies never tought it will turn like this…. am i not good enough to stick with?
i always tried to be loyal not cheating or stuffs, but nowdays love just like a game if you love more, you loose and looser get their broken heart.
i always trying to looks happy and keep smile no matter what but nobody know my true feeling, i can’t lie i felt heartache i’m not sure anymore that a good man really excist.
TikaMallory 